Humming blues

Ya, it's been a hard week.
More than the work and the 36 hours work schedules with 2 hours sleep in between, it's the loneliness. Viewing the photos in my mobile of times gone by, seeing my "Recieved calls" list and finding all 20 calls related to hospital work only.. it gets to you after awhile. I wonder how could I have come so far in life and still be so far away from a concrete path.. so unsure after so long of friends, of love, of where I am and who cares about me.
I keep wishing I could change my destiny..correct my mistakes just once, be the person I wanted to be. But then I guess, God doesn't do encores for our pleasures, does s/he ? So for now, I hearten myself with the thought - " If you can find it in your heart to get up just one more time than you have fallen, then you will succeed."
In the last week, I fell and stood up aplenty. I hope the next week brings more joy than the last, some laughter rather than none... or maybe just a simple surprise call from a friend.
Beggars can't be choosers, can we ?