Unsedated..

"No madam, I never copied from his book."
"I didn't eat the last chocolate, dad. Seriously. You told me not to na."
"I have no idea how that magazine got into my room."
"No dear, I was just staring at her throat and wondering if she had a thyroid condition."
"I don't drink. It's a bad habit."

It's funny how we follow paths set by others all our lives, isn't it ? The moral pathway, where we remain incapable of any wrongdoing and seek to remain forever the apple of someone's eye, whether it is a parent, a friend, a peer or a lover. Yet this pathway is so full of those forbidden fruits that we do find ourselves staring, reaching forward, seeking the fruit... till the rubber band of our morality either slaps us back into reality.. or snaps. And then we realise something - we no longer are the golden child, the dream lover, the bosom buddy. In seeking a new road, a tie is gone forever and we are left wondering the eternal question everyone needs to ask at some stage of their life - WAS IT WORTH IT ? Was deviating from the said path worth the effort and pain ? Where to from here ?
A simple saying comes to mind -" we don't get to choose how we die, only how we live." So if you find, you have fallen - get up. The race never ended. We're still in it. No amount of pain is worth giving up on life , because more often than not, you find that when you at the worst moment of your life - things will turn around. Stop yearning for the sun and the stars will start to be more visible.. There is always a brighter day ahead. Just keep riding through the night. You'll make it. We'll make it. And if my sources are right, beyond the pearly gates, God's arranging a Hawai hulla dance for all of us with a young Elvis and a young Britney. What more can you ask for ?
A final thought - what motivates you more when you pray - the fear of punishment for your sins or the love of God ?

STOP !!! Don't gimme the expected answer. That was the whole point of the first few lines of this post. Think a good hour and when you know the truth, then come back and reply..

P.S. I'm not depressed, don't worry. This post is based on the history of a patient I was looking after in Pune who seemed so desperately lost with his personal life crisis and his health all falling apart. He had made a mistake in his personal life, which kept haunting him and sadly, a disease chose to manifest itself simultaneously. Hence our meeting. And while we can assist in healing the disease, it would have been futile if he had not found a glimmer of hope , a reason to live for himself.

He did. He found his ray of light before he entered the operation theatre in the form of forgiveness - for his sin and also, along with that, the strength to carry on with life from here on in. To look to make amends and when he can't, solder on. Because no matter what, he realised the basic fact of life - you never , never give up.

Coincidentally, the operation was a success ( inspite of me and my bumbling drug ampule breaking skills!!! ). You see, boys and girls, that's called divine intervention !